"Vaccine 1 = done! Was so well-organized, and quick! No side effects, so, yay!"
"I lied. Side effects showed up about six hours later. I texted my boss at 5:30 this morning:"Nope."
"Why do the children think they have a say in whether they get the vaccine, or not? I didn't tell them it was optional. Who taught them to read?"
"I have given up knowing anything about anything. I am just assuming that everything is closed, or taped or otherwise inaccessible. Except booze, apparently. And weed. Do you think I'd like edibles?"
"These TikTok leggings are the most comfortable things I've worn. Plus, my COVID ass looks amazing-ish. You know, for COVID ass."
"Sooooo...I am not an edibles person. I mostly felt hot, like a hot flash and woke up 4 times, anyway. I'm dropping this banana bread off at your house. My kids like banana bread, and the last thing I need is for them to eat it, and get the munchies."
"New favourite thing: going for "rips" in the van, with the man-children. They hang out the window, blasting crappy music, and I pretend like I don't have anxiety about both of those things, and then we go home."
"Hockey sign up is up? Aw, maaaann. I was kind of enjoying spending all the money I've saved on Skip the Dishes."
"Are you a little bit sad, at the pandemic ending? The quiet of it all was nice."
"My kid needs new shoes. His dad sent me a picture of his toe, sticking right out of the shoe. I'm pretty sure lockdown trumps negligence, though. And really, who needs shoes?"
"So, a person can fly, but not drive? Like, anywhere? Is this the same thing as, "You can buy booze, but not shoes?"
"215 babies. There are thousands, more, yet. Every school, I'd say. And institution. Even here. Maybe especially here."
"I have no answers, love. None. Nothing. I am bereft - of knowledge, of wisdom, of...any of the things."
"Haven't even accessed their report cards. Not gonna. They passed. I didn't kill them. We're good."
"You know how I said I'd given up whiskey? I lied."
"I deleted TikTok, off my phone. I started watching a dog video on Tuesday and then all of a sudden, it was Sunday. Ok, not really, but...close."
"Zombie worms? As if. And if? Effing bring it."
"I read that some people aren't wearing masks now. Are they allowed to do that? I don't want to give up masks. First off, I'd have to start plucking chin hairs again, and secondly, how will I hide?"
"Shopping for anything but groceries is weird. I feel guilty and sneaky. Like I'm cheating on the...couch? My porch? The global community at large?"
"It's July. Maybe the aliens meant THIS year?"
"When the kids are grown and flown, we'll get together, ok? If they keep growing like this, that'll be sometime next week."
"When this is over, do you think we'll forget? I kind of want to remember being hopeful about who we might become, you know?"
"I miss you, still."
"As always, love...from here."