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I’m going to just come out and admit it: I have food-hoarding tendencies. No, that’s not accurate. I am an actual food hoarder. A RECOVERING food hoarder.
Let me explain: I am also an obsessive meal-planner, and fresh food does not go bad in my house. I use up all the fruits and vegetables I buy, every week. But I also cannot pass by a sale on cereal or certain canned goods without clicking my heels and loading up my cart.
That is, until recently, when I did a major kitchen purge.
I am here to tell you that if you have an hour or two to spare, use it not to google what is Hamilton and why is everyone so into it, it’s too late to really ask anyone without sounding stupid, but instead spring clean your kitchen. Then, follow a few simple steps to help you, too, curb your inner food hoarder.
As I said before, this is not my personal issue but it is a downfall for many people. Too many people complain of the fresh produce gone to compost in their crispers; with the price of produce these days, this is something you want to avoid.
The Clean-Up
Fill your sink with warm, soapy water. Take everything – absolutely everything – out of your fridge and set it on your countertops. It makes sense to do this prior to grocery shopping, for the sake of ease. Throw out anything rotting, expired, or fuzzy-looking. Wipe down all the shelves, take out the crisper drawers and wash them, and dry everything well with a soft cloth. Put everything back in the fridge, grouping by food type: bread products on one shelf, condiments on another, etc. Note what you threw out.
Going Forward
Every week before you purchase anything perishable, make a plan as to what you are going to use it for and when. Don’t just buy a cauliflower because it’s on sale; have a solid plan for that cauliflower! That cauliflower has feelings too, you know. It doesn’t want to end up in the compost. I know it’s controversial, but I never buy any produce with a “maybe I can use this dragon fruit in something” attitude. Have a plan and stick to it. Also, be realistic as to what your family likes and doesn’t like. There is no sense spending money on celery if everyone hates it.
Be honest: how many cans are in your pantry right now? I was shocked when I realized I had been purchasing so much more than I needed, just because it was on sale. Canned goods can and do expire, especially if you get in the habit of not rotating them when you buy more. I say this from experience, as someone who found a can of adobe chipotle peppers purchased for a recipe that I never made, in 2011.
The Clean-Up
Have a notepad handy; take out everything from your canned goods cupboard. Throw out everything that has expired; critically examine each can. Is there any way you are going to use them? Is this a case of the adobe chipotle peppers? If you are NOT going to use them, and they HAVEN’T expired, put them in a box for donation. Write down what you have left and the quantity.
Going Forward
This is the hard part: vow to eat what’s in your cupboard before you buy more. Even if it’s on sale, even if it’s buy-one-get-one-free. Keep that list and check off each item as you consume it. If you, like me, cannot bear the thought of having no emergency chickpeas or coconut milk in the cupboard, then make a hard and fast rule to only buy more when you are down to your last one or two cans. Stick to that rule.
Ah, the dry goods cupboard. The place where unwanted granola bars go to die, where cracker boxes are put away with 2 ½ crackers left in the bottom, where new brands of cereals sit, uneaten, because no one really liked the apple cinnamon clusters. The dry goods cupboard is my personal downfall, because when cereal is on sale, I take that as an invitation to fill my cart entirely. Hey, I admitted I’m a RECOVERING food hoarder. We all have our weaknesses.
The Clean-Up
Be firm. Be realistic. Just because your kids begged you to buy the new honey flavoured shredded wheat product, before discovering that they HATED the new honey flavoured shredded wheat product, doesn’t mean that it is going to get eaten. Why take up space in your cupboard with something no one wants? Throw it out, along with all the nearly-empty cracker boxes and rubber-banded bags of chip crumbs. Did you optimistically buy more than one of the disliked cereal, because it was BOGO? Donate it to the food bank – as long as it isn’t expired – along with any other unopened items that are not going to get consumed.
Going Forward
I know it’s tempting to give in when shopping with children who want to try new things. We want kids to expand their palates! But wasting hard-earned money on processed foods that take up valuable cupboard space isn’t cool, in my books. My personal policy is to either shop without the children or allow them to try one new thing per month from the cereal and cracker aisle. And any child who is caught putting an empty or nearly-empty box back in the cupboard is forced to wear that box as a hat for the entire day, along with a sign saying “I AM A JERK.” (Kidding, I don’t do that. But I would like to.)