Yummy Mummy Susan asks...
I am a stay at home mom to five kids - 18, 16, 14, 11, and 9. Yes I am busy but also bored...yes bored...what can I do to shake things up?? I have no money, cannot drive, and do not have any friends (we moved for hubbys work). I go for walks everyday but that is all I can do for now and for my sanity. I feel stuck in a rut and recently got hit with depression again. I'm seeking treatment but what can I do to get out?
Hello Susan!
I am so appreciative that you have reached out and asked for help. That is a TREMENDOUS first step. There are many things that you are trying to deal with simultaneously which adds pressure on an already busy situation including Mom Isolation from Moving, Depression, five children, Parenting Teens and Pre-Teens.
First, you need to know you are not alone. This affects many mothers and the problem is we don't like to talk about it. Since your children are older and more independent, you have more time to focus on yourself. Here are a few ideas that are simple ways to get you connected and really re-discover who you are as a Woman!
Join the discussions on online communities to find others that are on a similar path - try to share your story with them - it can absolutely support another Mom which is SO empowering!
Find a walking buddy to tag along - I walk with my neighbour (we've been doing them since 2003) and we discuss parenting, husbands, life, etc. - it's one of my support systems
Find local programs (that are free) or groups to join - the library is a GREAT resource and you can ask the librarian about programs to support you
Become involved with the schools of your kids as a volunteer - keeps the brain stimulated and allows you to connect with other moms and parents
Look for community volunteer work or a part time job that co-ordinates with the kids' schedules that is on a bus route or is within walking distance. A part-time job allows you to socialize and earn a little bit of revenue - my job absolutely saved my sanity after having baby number one.
Spend time with hubby re-connecting and re-kindling your relationship - make a pact NOT to discuss the kids
Ask the kids for ideas and suggestions on what you can do - they might be able to come up with some ideas you had never considered
Do some research on who you used to be - what did you used to enjoy, participate in, what made you laugh, what did you do in your spare time. Ask friends what you are good at and why they like hanging out with you.
The bottom line is you need a distraction that takes you out of Mom Mode and puts you in Susan Mode. You need something that stimulates your interests and ideas. Instead of focusing on what you don't have you focus on what you do have! Thank you for reaching out and let us know your progress!
Printer-friendly version