Who were you - the diva date who took control| asked men for whatever she wanted and got it? Or the gal who sat on the sidelines waiting for the day Bobby would ask her to the prom?
Are you carrying your dating style into motherhood?
Here we are| scouting the mom market| looking for moms that are...well| just like us. We want to find that perfect mummy group where we've got each other's backs through sleepless nights| sticky blowouts and the ever-so-annoying whining. And yes| we want to be able to gloat when the fantastic mummy moments make us proud. We want the group to help us get through this thing called parenting in one piece.
Enter social networking online!
These communities are really not that different than your Saturday night dance club. You meet some moms| chat about your kids and your life and you become friends -- or you don't. The primary difference with an online club is in the way you scout out other moms and initiate communication.
Lurk before you leap.
Just like going to the dance club| do the tour. Poke your way around the different areas such as blogs| forums| and groups. Each offers a different way of connecting and communicating with other moms. Find an area you feel comfortable in and watch from the sidelines for a while.
Strut your stuff.
Once you feel comfortable within the club| put yourself out there. "Look at me| I'm over here and I am fabulous!" Edit your profile to give moms a glimpse into what makes you tick. Post pictures to show how fun you and your kids can be. Don't doubt your yumminess for a second!
Make the play.
It all starts with small talk| right? Get out there| start answering requests for advice and start asking for it. Share your stories and don't be afraid to laugh at yourself. Join or start groups that peak your interest; perhaps you have a hobby or would like to get more exercise. Remember| you can be totally real in online communities| thank gawd. There is no pressure to be that person your co-workers| neighbours or your in-laws see!
Get off the bench.
Ok| you've been sitting on the sidelines for long enough now. You know who they are by now - the moms who made you think| laugh and feel pretty good about yourself. Be the diva - ask her to be your friend! Social networking sites have even made it easy for you| so no excuses. Usually| you simply push a button and poof| the request is sent to be your friend. (*Sigh* - if dating was only this easy back in the day...)
Be a Yummy friend.
It's one thing to add a friend| and quite another to be one. Once you've connected| go back and forth through private messages or email. You can both join the same group (online or off). Get to know what makes her a yummy mummy. Ask questions| and listen. Allow her to vent| laugh and cry . Pay attention to what is happening in each other's lives| and follow up on it. Be supportive without telling her what to do or how to feel. Don't mother her.
Get a mommy network! Share the joys of parenting and begin to laugh at the things can't seem to do by ourselves!