I’m Okay With My Kids Hitting a Schoolyard Bully

There’s an article making the rounds about why a psychologist is actually in favour of kids fighting back against a schoolyard bully.

It’s a position that has people divided, including our own group of writers at YMC.

So I’m going to put myself out on a limb and say straight out, I’m completely fine if my kids fight back against a schoolyard bully.

When my older son was in Grade 2 he was picked on by some kids due to the fact that my 7-year-old wore a suit and tie to school every day and he carried a briefcase. Because it wasn’t the norm, a few older kids decided he was a good target. They made mean comments and stole his briefcase, tossing it back and forth between them so he couldn’t get it.

Now here’s the part of the story I never told because I didn’t want to be crucified on the internet.

He managed to get the briefcase back and then promptly hit the instigator with it. Hard.

He then ran into the school and got a teacher.

And you know what? I was okay with it.

I’ve taught both my boys to work things out with word first. The next step is to go to an adult in charge. I have an open relationship with both my boys and we have ongoing conversations about many important topics including bullying. Neither of my boys has ever gotten in a fight and I hope neither of them ever does. At the end of the day, I absolutely believe that physical fights solve absolutely nothing.

But if someone decides to take it to the next level and hit my child both my boys are 100% allowed to defend themselves and they will not get in any trouble when they get home even if they get in trouble at school.

However, they both know that there will be a long conversation about the whole situation. Probably more than one. And I’ll make them understand the lessons behind their actions.

It’s my hope that any bullying situation never ends in a physical altercation for anyone. But the reality is, it does happen and we can't hide our head in the sand and pretend it doesn't.

Which is why my boys are never, ever allowed to start a fight but they sure as shit can end one.