Maureen Turner: We Are Family


Five Things I've Learned From My Husband

Men Know Some Things

I often write funny posts about my husband, but the truth is, he’s a really smart guy. I just really like to tease him.

So this post is about the things that my husband has taught me over the years.

1. Zippers
The other day I cut Siobhan out of her sweatshirt with scissors because the zipper wouldn’t work. When Tom came home he explained to me that zippers aren’t as basic as we think they are. Zippers work on a wedge and hook system and that little tag you hold onto, to pull the zipper, it actually has to trigger the release of the first tooth and get things going. That’s why, without the tag, I wasn’t able to undo Siobhans shirt. If you lose that tag, Tom showed me how to put a safety pin through the top and it will get your zipper going again.

2. MMA is an interesting sport.
Okay, perhaps this doesn’t make him sound like the smartest guy around. People tend to think that fighters are meat heads. I’m not one of those people. I have always enjoyed boxing, I even trained to box. No, I don’t mean an aerobic kick boxing class, I mean in a ring. Anyway, my issue with MMA wasn’t that I thought they were idiots, it was that I couldn’t get into the way they fight. I liked fights where they remained standing, but the ground work bored me. Tom taught me about strategy and the more I watched, the more I began to enjoy. I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but if you watch, The UFC is all about respect. I still maintain that UFC is NOT for kids though... TOM!

3. The Bathroom is Kid-Free Time
My husband likes to refer to the bathroom as his office, I know he’s not the first person to call it that, but does anyone else actually make it into an office? Tom actually takes a kitchen stool as his desk and takes the lap top into the bathroom! I used to think he was crazy, until I realized he was spending 45 minutes of uninterrupted time reading! I may or may not have taken that computer into the bathroom once or twice after this realization.

4. Read The Manual
When I get something new, I like to start playing with it immediately. I like to figure things out as I go... sometimes it doesn’t work out for me. So, when Tom bought me a fancy dancy new camera, I was told to read the manual. He reads the manual for EVERYTHING, and he always knows exactly how things work. Generally, I just ask him. You know what? The manuals are very informative! Who knew?? Since Tom and I started living together, I have started reading more about how things work... now, I even click the Help button when I’m on the computer! It’s amazing how well things work when you actually know how to use them!

5. Anything (and I mean ANYTHING) Can be Made Into A Song
Tom sings... A LOT. He will sing about anything. I sometimes think that I live in a musical... and then I listen to the lyrics. The other day, when I hadn’t showered yet, he sang a song to Siobhan called Stinky Mommy, and when he is preparing food he sings this song: (Let’s say he’s making pizza) “Pizza is so good for you, it makes you pee and it makes you poo.” The kids think it’s great because mostly he sings about bodily functions and bums. I know, you’re jealous. Don’t ya wish you lived at my house?

There you have it, 5 things I’ve learned from my husband.