Hypothesis: Babies are gross!
As I sit here writing this blog, I have baby puke stains on both, my pants and my shirt.
Think about it, what do they do all day? They sleep... okay, that part is cute, but from the moment they wake up it’s all down hill from there.
They dribble while they eat, drool because their teeth are coming. Then, the dribble and the drool combine to become that, gross, sour milk smelling stuff that gathers under their many chins until you somehow manage to get a cloth in there. They puke and burp and fart.
If it weren’t for me, I swear Siobhan would sit in her own filth all day... she wouldn’t even get out of her PJ’s, I bet!
Can we talk about the poo? My god, the poo! Could ya at least TRY to keep it in the diaper, baby? Seriously, trying to get a poo covered onsie over a squirming baby’s head is not a fun task. And where does that giant poo stink come from?? You only eat like three different types of food, how are carrots so smelly? Why are pears so green? G.R.O.S.S!!
Can’t wait till she reaches that “Hey look what I found in my nose!” stage. Where they think you are responsible for discarding all of their boogers. Good times.
Recently, Siobhan discovered that she likes to drink water from my glass. So, when I pour a glass of water, she puts on that Oh-I’m-So-Adorable-Look-At-How-Cute-I-Am face, and for a moment, I forget how gross she is until there’s a bunch of floaties in my water and drool is running down the side of my glass. By the time she’s done, my glass looks more like a snow globe. I can’t take credit for that line, thanks Jay.
This video is further proof:
Conclusion: Babies are gross!
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