Looking back over my twenties, I laugh at the problems I considered to be challenging at the time. In my thirties, I encountered a little something called parenting, where the challenges are significant and sometimes overwhelming.
I experienced the regular mummy growing pains with my first child; the sleepless nights and worries like, "Is he eating enough? Is he growing enough? Am I mom enough?"
When our second child was born, those challenges paled in comparison. Our daughter was diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder that turned everything I had learned about raising a child on its ear.
Tiptoeing into my forties, I focused all of my energy on her. Consumed by her needs, I stopped taking care of me. My treadmill collected dust, I worried, and I stopped entertaining and being social and avoided many of the activities I had once enjoyed. I wasn't eating or sleeping well. I gained a few pounds and felt generally unwell.
This tunnel vision and disregard for my own health took a toll. I wasn't doing my daughter or myself any good by being this lesser version of me. More than half of girls globally say their mother is one of their female role models. I want my daughter to look at me and think, "My mom is beautiful. She loves me, and she loves herself, too. She's unstoppable, and so am I."
It was time to bring back the real version of me. I began exercising and casually entertaining again and tried to balance my legitimate concerns for my daughter with purposeful action. I started writing about family life—raising my kids, one with special needs. This gave me a voice, and I soon discovered a community of parents who could relate.
I'm not perfect of course. There are still days when I feel myself being pulled back down into that place; when a medical procedure for my daughter looms, or work or life stress robs me of sleep and makes it difficult to breathe. That's when I turn to humour and friendship to calm my racing heart. The support I receive from other parents is a life preserver. This is why I strive to be a role model—not only by sharing the positive stories, but by divulging the challenges, mistakes, and scary parts of parenthood too.
This is proudly sponsored by our friends at Dove®
www.dove.ca
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