How are your resolutions going? January always represents a fresh start and a time to make goals for the year. But sometimes—not far into it—I've seen many well intentioned plans or rigid resolutions fall by the wayside and the inevitable frustration that follows.
It is hard to make all the changes you want in your life, and disappointing when you had planned that things would be different. So, in the midst of it all, we often say things will be better. We roll up our shirt sleeves and get ready for the yearly overhaul, only to find the plan has lapsed or the system has fallen apart.
It's okay, because today is January 30th. That is all it is. And January 30th isn't the day that represents the seventh day of going off your New Year's plan. No, it is just a Thursday. So, be in Thursday or whichever day you are reading this. Be in the moment and simply make your plans for today. Leave the "could've, would've and should'ves" behind!
I am a mother of a five-year-old, so although I try to keep up with the latest literature in therapy, I sometimes get my pieces of wisdom from what my daughter is watching. Thank you, Pixar. The American Jackalope might be the wisest sage of the bunch. He shares this piece of mindful “bound and rebound” advice:
"Now sometimes you're up and sometimes you're down.
When you find that you're down, well just look around.
You still got a body, good legs, and fine feet,
get your head in the right place and hey you're complete."
It's true, we need to get our heads in the right place. We need to be more mindful in our day-to-day. It is tough when a plan isn't reached. Believe me I get it. Not just as a therapist, but in my own life. Like The A-Team's Hannibal—I love it when a plan comes together! I seriously love it—so much—it is sometimes hard for me to not toss the whole plan out if it isn't being followed exactly. I also know this isn't healthy, necessary, or very mindful. So, perhaps you can join me on a new plan where we set our reasonable goals with lots of room for changes, patience, and acceptance. Simply try, and if it's not perfect? Try again and bound and rebound!