I laugh with my kids a lot. We jump on beds daily. We make huge messes. We bake together, and I let them play in mud puddles fairly often.
But one thing I've realized lately is that I'm getting annoyed with my 4 year-old son when he's doing things that are totally normal for kids to do.
Like playing with a tree branch that has fallen to the ground and bashing it against a fence until it smashes into smaller pieces.
For him: this is incredibly fun.
For me: this is incredibly annoying.
I want to walk to the park, and his sister is pulling my arm "Let's go!" And he's stopping to...be destructive and smash things? What's next? Skinning squirrels? (I took that too far, too fast, didn't I?)
So I find myself saying things like, "Put that down!" and "Don't do that!" In a tone slightly harsher than I intended. Oops. And then I feel guilty, of course, and remind myself that he needs to do these things. Kids need time to just be kids and not follow rules and be destructive sometimes. Right?
I'm pretty sure it sounds like something that an educated parenting professional would write about "...studies show that children who bash tree branches are 87% more likely to become well adjusted adults who have deeper connections with others...and rarely eat refined sugar."
Yeah, that sounds about right.
So I pick the branch up off the ground, "Oh, why not? - let's have a smashing party!" I begin to growl (because naturally that's how I assume testosterone works?) And for two minutes, we smash a tree branch. Until my daughter gets a little too worked up trying to keep up with her older brother, and almost impales herself.
"Okay, game over. Let's go to the park!"
Hey - I tried!
Hello, my name is Jen Warman and I hide my snacks...from myself.
Actually, if I'm being completely honest here, I actually get my helpful husband to hide the snacks because if it fits into the "tastes amazingly delicious" category, it cannot be within my reach. If I know where it is, I will eat it before some anticipated me-time arrives. If a scrumptious something does somehow find its way into our house, I literally have to ask my husband to lock it in our safe (which I don't know the combination to). This is so I won't be tempted by the sweet beckoning voice of whatever tasty treat is tempting me. I'm 100% serious!
I know this sounds extreme, but I read a recent study that said 32% of Canadian women also hide their snacks in anticipation of me-time! Woo-hoo, I'm not the only one! Except, I have a sneaking suspicion most people probably hide their snacks because they don't want other people to find them. Hmm...
So when three bags of Smartfood recently arrived at my house, my instinct was to hide these delicious bags of cheddar temptations so I could save them. But the problem was...the bags were too big to fit into our safe!
I then did what any good snack hoarder would do. I found a new and creative hiding spot: zipped inside a throw pillow. Out of sight from the kids, and within arms reach for me! Which is both a good idea, and a bad idea.
The problem was...I knew where this hiding spot was, therefore...
*munch munch munch* The Smartfood didn't last long. But the plus side? I didn't have to share it.
But this post isn't about snack guilt! No! We're hard-working parents and it's important for us to enjoy some me-time every now and then. Personally, during my me-time, I look forward to mindlessly munching on something ridiculously delicious while watching zombies take over the world. (I'm currently really into The Walking Dead, can you tell?)
Consider this post a public service. I'm opening up to you about my closet (and safe) snack hoarding so that you feel less alone if you are also snack hoarder! We can HELP one another...HELP ONE ANOTHER DISCOVER AWESOME NEW PLACES TO HIDE SNACKS, that is! Apparently, 37% of Canadian women hide their snacks on the top shelf of their cupboard, 35% stash theirs in their pantry, and 19% have treats hidden in their desk drawer. Funny enough, there was no mention of anyone else using a safe to barricade their goodies...
So, fess up. What are some of your favourite places to stash your snacks so they're ready and waiting for YOUR me-time?!?
Categorize this under: FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS for sure, but I'm sure you can agree...
Trying to fold a fitted sheet is damn annoying! It is I just burned my tongue on hot coffee and now I'll feel the effects of that all day long annoying? No. But it's still frustrating.
For those of you who color code your linen closets, you probably nearly have an aneurysm trying to get your fitted sheets "just so," am I right?
Well look no further, I've found a way to solve this ancient problem! I'm still trying hard to figure out other really important things, like how to make chocolate not taste so good...but in the meantime...
FOLDING FITTED SHEETS. See the video below so you can master this art, and move on with your life!
RELATED: The Easiest Lunch You'll Ever Make: F*#k It a la Carte
Printer-friendly version