Jen Warman: New Freakin' Mummy


The Pregnancy Rage Hormone


Hey, you know that thing where you're pregnant and terribly sleep deprived and then you become a raging pscyho bitch?

"No, not you Jen! You're so sweet. You're so nice."

That's probably what you're thinking...unless you're my husband.

Lately, I've been murdering my husband with my eyes. Death daggers. All the time. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

HIM: "Hey, good morning!"

ME: (death daggers)

HIM: "Do you want me to go grocery shopping, or do you want to go?"

ME: (death daggers)

*sigh* My poor, poor husband. Why do I bottle up all of my rage for him, and him alone? I think I've figured it out, and it's all very scientific:

Since I'm growing a child that is 1/2 his DNA, my body probably releases RH2 whenever he is near (rage hormone #2). I released RH1 when I was pregnant with our first child, but RH2 is more intense because it's the second child. RH exists as the body's way of making the male partner accountable for his role in the pregnancy. The women have to endure morning sickness, tender breasts, bloating, indigestion, constipation this is the body's natural way of evening out the playing field a little. When a woman is releasing RH, there is no sexual intercourse. Men are too scared of the woman, and are too afraid to touch her. This takes pressure off of the woman, and makes everyone happier. 

So there you have it ladies and gentlemen. Now please excuse me while I go and write my official dissertation on the subject matter...