Beware the Hidden Underbelly of Summer

The Jerkiest Jerks that Summer Brings

Beware the Hidden Underbelly of Summer

the rants of summer

If you know me, you know I love summer. I really do. I live for these rare few months (weeks) (days) of hot weather.

I know I'm not the only one. Most people love summer. Everyone smiles a bit brighter and laughs a little louder during this time of year. It’s the extra vitamin D, I think.

Summer is the golden child, the eternal favourite who can do no wrong.

But....(yes, there's always a but!)

There are parts of summer that are less than ideal. Downright miserable, in fact. Miserable enough to warrant a rant.

I know we tend to overlook all the bad bits and pieces because, well, it is summer and summer is awesome but I'm here to remind you that it's not all roses.

I know you’re having a hard time with this. You might even be worried I’ll jinx this weather. I won’t. I only wish I had that kind of power, so just hear me out.

The following five reasons are completely legitimate explanations as to why summer can be a bit of a jerk:

Extra laundry for days

Summer means long days playing outside in the mud and grass and sprinklers. Which sounds lovely until about dinner time when the kids come in and you realize they've just created about 34.7 new loads of laundry for you to do tonight. Wet towels, dirty clothes, the whole shebang. And good luck trying to get out those grass stains because it’s not happening.

The blasphemous sun

I know, I know. It's everything and more. Who can hate the sun?! Parents, that's who. At bedtime when it's wine o'clock time and the kids are still wide awake because of...the sun. Not to mention that it’ll wake them up at least an hour earlier come morning, along with those pesky, chirpy birds. Damn you, sun. And  damn you, birds.

Asshole mosquitoes

Mosquitoes are the dark side of summer. And they're everywhere. You know how to get rid of them? No, of course you don't! Because it's impossible. They live through everything. Bubonic plague? No worries, the mosquitoes will live. In fact, they'll thrive.

Bug spray

Speaking of mosquitoes, bug spray is the most noxious thing you’ll ever encounter. I don’t understand how something that doesn’t even work has a smell that lingers forever. I bet every single one of us has experienced a mosquito bite while having been sprayed liberally with this toxic nightmare. Yet, we’ll continue to wear it. Because it’s a summer ritual. Much like witch hunts once were. For the record, they were bogus too.


The pain of this ailment is made even worse because everyone you come across is going to mention that you should have used sunscreen. You think? I wonder why I never thought of that. In fact, I think this red colour really suits me. Oh, and the wincing? Totally for effect. Basically, you can't win for losing.

See, I told you I had a valid reason (or five) for this rant.

Almost makes me wish summer was over. NOT. AT. ALL. Who am I kidding?! I still love summer. Bad parts and all.

But at the very least, think about these nuisances when winter hits us hard in the face.

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