I have a list of pet peeves. Just those little things that seem to get under my skin.
Only, there’s a slight problem with my list.
See, the thing is….
I commit each of these pet peeves on the regular. The very regular. Perhaps even daily.
I’m the ultimate hypocrite.
It’s not an unusually creative list. Nor is it especially exhaustive:
I hate when people get mindlessly addicted to online games.
I don't know how it happened. First Angry Birds, now Candy Crush. It's a terrible thing.
I hate when people are late.
I’m always late. Always. I’m notoriously known as the girl who is always late, that’s how bad it is.
I hate when people use inappropriate language in front of children.
I have the mouth of a sailor. I’m constantly trying to watch what I say in front of my daughters. Sometimes I slip up. Okay, fine, maybe more than sometimes as my older daughter likes to point out.
I hate when people don’t text me back right away.
I always forget to text people back. I check my messages. I promise, I really do. I check them and then I promptly forget about them. Not cool.
I hate when people with more than 6 items of groceries line up in the express line.
I have done this. I have tried to sneak another item or two into this lineup when I fully know I shouldn’t. I’m not making any excuses for it and trust me, I’m not proud of it.
I hate when people can’t control their dogs.
This is me. I cannot control my dog. He knows who’s in charge and it’s definitely not me. I try to manage him as best I can and by that, I mean I keep him on a leash whenever I take him out. He might pull and tug and try to get away but he’s on that leash. That sorta counts, right?
I hate when people don’t know how to park.
I don’t know how to park. I really suck at it. And not just parallel parking, either. I suck at all types of parking. I’m the person who needs to reverse a dozen times before the car is parked straight. I’m really very sorry about this.
These are my Achilles Heel so to speak. The things that I just can’t get right, no matter how hard I try. You’d think that I’d be on top of it since they’re on my own list of pet peeves. You’d think that and you’d be wrong.
Unfortunately, for the life of me, I cannot get it together. This is like my ultimate failure list.
*face palm and hangs head in shame*
Ah, the sting of self-loathing is unlike any other.
Anyone else out there know what this feels like? I can’t be the only one!