Gurpreet Randev: Bollywood Babies

Mar
15
2013

The 5 Most Useless Baby Products Ever Made

Babies Need A Lot Of Gear But Some Things, Not So Much

Cribs, strollers, baby monitors, bottles, bathtubs, and on and on. The list of products that first time parents need is never-ending and often overwhelming. But some of the stuff being peddled to excited new parents is just ridiculous and a waste of money! Money that could be better spent on diapers. Seriously. Do you even realize how many diapers you will need?!

I know it’s tempting to buy everything. It’s just so hard to resist all that cuteness but rest assured that there are some products being sold as ‘must-haves' that you will rarely (if ever) use.

Here is my list of the most useless baby products out there:

Pee-Pee Teepee. A product designed for little boys to help make diaper changing dry and easy. I’m not even kidding. This product really exists. The person who invented this is obviously smirking every single time someone actually buys one of these. That’s all I’m going to say about this one.

Baby Wipes Warmer. Such a waste of money! I like to rinse out baby wipes before applying them to my infant’s skin to get rid of chemicals so I just use warm water and it did the same thing without spending a dime. Maybe I can try to bottle and market warm water? Hmm, better look into copyrighting that.

Baby Robe. When do babies actually wear these? As they’re relaxing with their evening cup of tea? And an extra step after bathing? As if. The reality is that you will most likely bathe baby and then bundle her into the warmest clothes you can find in hopes of having her nice and cozy enough to sleep through the night (pipe dreams, my friend).

Prenatal MP3 Player. There are probably few women out there who would welcome the idea of strapping an uncomfortable device to their already uncomfortable pregnant self.  And really, I’m pretty sure the baby doesn’t care if you’re strapping Mozart to your belly or if you’re listening to it from your speakers.

Designer Baby Perfume. This one might just take the cake. As any parent will attest, one of the best things about babies is their baby smell. It’s freaking awesome. Soon enough, your child will smell like grime and mud so just enjoy it while you can. Why pay exorbitant amounts of money to actually cover it up?! Save the Bulgari for yourself.

There are going to be a lot of things you’re going to need. This stuff? Not so much (and when I say not so much, I really mean not at all). So save your pennies.

For diapers.

And more diapers.