Responsibility and mind-blowing sex are like oil and water...they just don't mix.
It's easy to understand with everything going on in our day-to-day lives why sex goes to the bottom of the to-do list.
Thing is, sex is an important component to a healthy relationship. So how can a hard-working couple bring fun sex back into their relationship?
It's my experience that busy people don't have time to read the long answer, so here is the quick and easy on what you two can start doing today.
Don’t wait: act now
Sexual impasses don’t get better with time. The longer you wait to initiate something fun, new and exciting the longer old habits linger and get in the way of creating something fun, new and exciting.
Talk to each other about you 'can' do
Complaining about how your sex life sucks is the biggest libido zapper. If you don’t talk about what’s going on in your sex life in a positive way, the situation will never change.
Understand the problem
Acknowledge (and appreciate) your partner’s dissatisfactions in order to understand why they’ve stopped reaching out sexually.
Separate the nonsexual issues from the sexual ones
What are the facts—not emotions—around any sexual challenges? What are the reasons for the anger, resentment or withholding? Until these issues are dealt with and resolved, it's almost impossible to connect in a deep sexual way. If you're at an impasse, seek out a counselor's help.
Teach each other new sexual techniques
Learn how to give each other pleasure in new and exciting ways. Communicate what you want. Best way to start is to separately write a list of things you want to try and then let the other read it. Bonus points to those couples who take turns 'surprising' each other with what's on their partner's list.
Other Dr. Trina blogs
Five Ways to Overcome Low Sexual Desire
Do Aphrodisiacs Really Work?
Touching Means a Happier You
Printer-friendly version