Dr. Trina Read: Beyond the Bedroom

Dec
07
2012

Spicing Things Up With Porn

A little porn can add a lot of spice…it’s finding the right porn to suit your taste and values.

Week #14 of the Six Month Sex Challenge:

To end the all-about-my husband-sexpalooza I decided to give him a little porn treat. Pirates 2: Stagnetti’s Revenge, is a porn spoof of the movie Pirates of the Caribbean. It’s a four disk 'collectors' set and has received a lot of positive hype.

Oh Those Crazy University Days
When I was in university, my male roommate published a swinger magazine (...in Saskatchewan...oh those crazy Yorkton couples). Part of his magazine’s editorial was reviewing porn; so there was always a porn movie on at the house.

Once I came home to find two naked women wrestling in vegetable oil on my kitchen floor who were being photographed for the mag’s cover shot. All I could say to my roommate was, “I hope you’re going to clean this up!” That time in my life seems so surreal now.

Watching that much porn then and during graduate school makes me rather ho-hum about it. Viewing a porn with my husband hasn’t been that exciting (for him) because instead of me getting all hot and bothered, I’m too busy commenting on other things—like lighting quality, set construction and whether actors are wearing condoms.

Porn…What a Touchy Topic With Women
Feminists (loudly) proclaim that porn degrades women and uses them as objects only for the pleasure of men. Too many women automatically give a thumbs-down to watching a porn flick without trying it out for themselves.

What Do Women Porn Actors Think?
While attending graduate school, some of my classmates were former porn actors. I’ve also spoken at sex trade shows and have met my share of porn leading ladies (and men). Every single one of these women in no way feel exploited. They, in fact, think they are the true feminist because they are able to express their sexuality as they want and aren’t suppressed by society’s narrow definition of what is appropriate sexual conduct.

The Pros and Cons of Porn
Admittedly, there are some not so great things about porn that the media tends to obsess about. Yes, porn—especially internet porn—can have detrimental effects for males who show obsessive compulsive tendencies. Yes, there is some hardcore stuff out there. Yes, porn tends to be male-centric.

However, there are also a lot of good things to be said about porn. And for the majority of the population, a little soft porn can add  spice and fun to your sex life. More and more, porn producers have come to see there is a solid market of women who like to watch porn.

So, perhaps it’s time to try porn. If you try it and don’t like it, fine. But at least give it a few, heartfelt, tries. You might be surprised that it turns into a fun once-in-a-while treat for you and your partner.

My Rating on Pirate II
With all the hype surrounding Pirates II, I was disappointed. On the positive side, it’s the best ‘movie’ porn I’ve seen—the acting is so-so, but come on it’s a porn flick. There’s a strong story line, drama and some pretty funny one-liners. But when it got into the sex scenes, I must confess it wasn’t my cup of tea. The sex was too edgy, very male-centric. Sigh. I really wanted to recommend a good porn for women to watch but this wouldn’t be it.


My Husband’s Rating on Pirate II
Two ratings again this week. 7.5/ 10 for it being a “movie with sex scenes” with great special effects. 5/10 for the sex scenes. He felt it was “jack rabbit sex” and the actors were way over the top enthusiastic during sex. He much prefers porn where there is a connection between the actors and the sex is more sensual. (Ya’ see ladies, guys aren’t automatically turned-on by big breasted, skinny-arsed naked women having sex on a screen.)

More Six Month Sex Challenge
Praise His Penis
I Went Shopping for Underwear...With My Two Toddlers
My Sexual Needs Versus The Football Game

(My Six Month Sex Challenge blog series was originally published in 2009. I'm happy to report now that my kids are 3 and 5 years old, my sex life is back on track!)

Pirates II: Stagnetti's Revenge  Image source