Bed Bugs

There’s lots of things you want to come back from holidays with, like souvenirs or a great pair of shoes, but bed bugs are probably not on the list. Like it or not though, the little pests are on the move. I have now scratched exactly 345 times since the beginning of this paragraph. As you may have guessed, I’m a little bit psycho about the little buggers. So here is a crash course on bed bugs.

Where you’ll find bed bugs: They like beds. Hello? This is kind of a no-brainer. Hotels, hostels, dormitories. They’re easy like Sunday morning and they like to sleep around.

Because getting bed bugs in right up there with alien invasion on my paranoia list, I’ve compiled a little list of things you should do to avoid bringing home more than you bargained for on holidays.

Inspect the bed in your hotel room BEFORE you unpack. Look along the seams of the mattress for small flat bugs or small blood spots.

 Never, ever, ever put your luggage on the bed. Don’t. Even. Think. About. It.

 Place your dirty clothes into plastic bags and suffocate the little creeps. Don’t feel bad about it.

 Vacuum out your luggage and any other hard surface such as your vanity case before putting it away.

 Leave your luggage outside your house if you can’t get to it right away.

 If you live in a cold climate leave your suitcase out in below zero weather for 24 hours and they’ll freeze to death. Hot climate? Leave your luggage in a sweltering car for as long as possible.

 If you travel frequently, it’s important you stay vigilant at home. Bed bugs can survive for up to a year without feeding. Vacuum your beds frequently and wash your sheets in hot water once a week.

 Don’t let your guard down. Bed bugs have been found in the swankiest hotels across the globe. No one is immune. Comforting, I know.

 Finally, heaven forbid, if you do get bed bugs in your house, call in a professional right away. They are very hard to get rid of once you get them and you’ll need the help.

Excuse me, I need to go scrub my body down with a steel wire brush now. Sleep tight, don’t let the bed bugs bite.

*I am totally kidding about the alien invasion thing. I do not have this list hanging on my office wall.