Ali Martell: Straight Up, With a Twist


I am Basically Amish

What Jude Law and I have in Common

Oh my. 

So, I need to come clean to you guys. 

Ever since this lovely lady admitted her love of Nickelback, I wondered if maybe I needed to stop hiding behind a shameful little secret. 

I don't know if you know, but Jude Law is kind of Amish now. 



I dig it. 

It actually might make him even more appealing to me. You see, Jude Law has been my pretend celebrity boyfriend since 1999. He had me at The Talented Mr. Ripley. And I have stood by him. Sure, there have been some questionable movie choices (I'm looking at you, A.I. Artificial Intelligence), and some questionable life choices (I'm looking at you, Nanny), and some questionable wardrobe choices (I'm looking at you, MANPRIS) and, obviously, there's the whole has-he-or-has-he-not-had-hair-plugs debacle. And yet. I'm still standing by my man. 

(No matter how much Jon Hamm and Ryan Gosling try to change my mind.)

(Which is A LOT.)

But no, that's not the shameful little secret. 

The secret is that I am hoping Jude Law's new Amish ways means that he is into Amish girls, because you guys, I am basically Amish. 

I like to go to bed early, I don't dance, I like quilts, I love butter, I own much wooden furniture, I wear a lot of dresses



I said it.

I do not drink wine. 

I don't like it.

At all.

Can we still be friends?