Audiences: Put Down the D*mn Phone!

“Theater is not a social event”

Audiences: Put Down the D*mn Phone!

Patti Lupone takes audience members phone

When you watch Patti LuPone on stage - or anyone else for that matter - please put down your damn cell phone. The legendary theatre actress was up in arms after an audience member texted throughout a recent performance of “Shows for Days” at the Lincoln Center.

According to LuPone, four cell phones rang during a matinee. So by the time the evening show rolled around, LuPone was at her wit’s end. A woman in the second row texted throughout the show, distracting cast and audience members alike.

At the end of a scene, as LuPone shook the hands of various audience members, she seized the moment - and the woman’s cell.

“I should be a sleight of hand artist,” LuPone joked. The phone was passed to the house manager and returned to the woman at the end of the performance.

But the phone incident was no laughing matter for LuPone, who was so disgusted by the behaviour that left the Tony- and Olivier-winning actress “seriously questioning” whether she wants to continue her work in theatre.

"We work hard on stage to create a world that is being totally destroyed by a few, rude, self-absorbed and inconsiderate audience members who are controlled by their phones. They cannot put them down.

When a phone goes off or when a LED screen can be seen in the dark it ruins the experience for everyone else – the majority of the audience at that performance and the actors on stage."

“I don’t know what to do anymore. I was hired as an actor, not a policeman of the audience,” said LuPone. “It’s getting worse. I’m hired to tell a story, and it takes a lot of effort and work to do that convincingly. It’s a handful of people who destroy that experience for everyone. It’s heartbreaking. Theater is not a social event.”

I can only applaud LuPone for her ballsy move that night. People pay good money to attend sporting events, concerts and performances of any kind. If you don’t want to be there, then why the hell did you go?

And if you must, at least have the common decency not to ruin the show for everyone else. If you’re not into it, that’s fine, but do the world a courtesy and go into the lobby to use your phone. You’re not invisible.

This was not the work of a diva. What LuPone did that night was an intervention. And she wasn’t just singling out one woman; she was schooling all of us on the definition of respect. 

 RELATED: How Texting Your Teen Can Help Your Relationship


Calm the F&*$ Down: Do McDonalds Minion Toys Swear?

para la bukay everybody

Calm the F&*$ Down: Do McDonalds Minion Toys Swear?

do McDonalds Minions swear

Kids all over are going bananas over the latest Despicable Me franchise, Minions, but not all parents share their enthusiasm. As part of its latest Happy Meal, McDonald’s has included toy minions that utter the characters’ trademark gobbledygook.

In case you didn’t know, the loveably mischievous minions stole the show in the first two Despicable movies, earning them their own feature-length film. They don’t actually speak, but simply spout a kind of delightfully nonsensical babble.

However, some parents in the US swear that at least one of the three phrases uttered by the McDonald’s toys contains profanity.

“Honestly, the beginning, I don’t know what it’s saying, but the last few words sound like ‘W-T-F,’” said an Alabama mom.

Parents from Florida and Ohio also complained about what they think the toys are saying.

But McDonald’s is urging parents to calm the eff down.

“Minions speak ‘Minionese,’ which is a random combination of many languages and nonsense words and sounds,” said McD’s spokesperson Lisa McComb.

“The Minion Caveman Happy Meal toy includes three phrases: ‘para la bukay,’ ‘hahaha,’ and ‘eh eh.’ Any perceived similarities to actual English words are purely coincidental.” 

Basically the minions are just spouting gibberish, and any resemblance to the human language is nothing more than happenstance. 

Psychologist and swearing expert, Timothy Jay, author of What To Do When Your Kids Talk Dirty concurs. He told Yahoo that parents are likely hearing things based on their own experience and may inadvertently be drawing attention to exactly what they want their kids to avoid:

“Parents who hear [the swearing] are given a blueprint for what’s there and so they’re going to hear that. Kids just think they’re hearing some funny little Minion thing.”

For parents worried about the possible profanity, best not head to McDonald’s for the summer. More for me to collect. Hahaha eh eh

Image Source: YouTube

 RELATED: Ariana Grande Defends Donut Lick-gate 


Mom Vlogs About Judgement, Gets Judged

wisdom from a bubble bath

Mom Vlogs About Judgement, Gets Judged

Vlogging about judgement

Nostril_Curl knows that when it comes to being a woman, you're damned if you do, damned if you don't. 

In a recent post called "The Ugly Judgement of Society," the vlogger describes all the double standards that face women from the moment they become moms: 

Girl is a stay-at-home - she probably doesn't do anything all day but watch TV.
Girl gets job - how can she stand to be away from her baby all day like that.

Girl lets kids play without her - she is an unfit mother, where is she?
Girl is overprotective of her kids - poor kids, no childhood.

Parenthood, Nostril nails it.


the ugly judgement of society (w subtitles... share awayyy)

Posted by Nostril_Curl on Saturday, July 4, 2015

But here's the thing. The vlogger delivers her sermon from the comfort of her own bubble bath, and someone notices and comments.They're not quite passing judgment though wait, maybe they are. 

That's when Nostril's vlog goes kinda meta because suddenly her video about societal judgement is itself being judged:

"See ur judging me by me taking a bubble bath. This video is about judging and now see who is judging me, you! As if ur saying I'm taking a bubble bath and show the world because I want attention! But really I was taking a break from my kids and enjoy my bubble bath from a long day!!!! And at least I'm COVERED!"

Did I notice she was in a bath with bubbles stuck to the back of her head? Why, yes, I did. For a split second, then I forgot about it. Because frankly those bubbles were beside the point. 
(And even though it's not all that convenient, don't we all get struck down by passing, earth-shattering wisdom while we are in the bath or shower?)
In Nostril's own words: no matter what you do, people are gonna talk shit. So do what's best for you. That applies to parenting and well, pretty much everything else, too.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to run a bath...