There is this myth of motherhood that has been perpetuated over the years about moms who do it all and how does she do it and oh-my-god-how-do-you-manage? I admit, I’m guilty of it. I look at other moms and wonder how they can look like they just came from the salon when I know full well they were wrangling four kids through breakfast and the get-to-school routine. We all have our struggles so why do we think that everyone else is handling things with seeming ease?
When someone said “I don’t know how you do it all,” to me the other day, I laughed. Out loud. And hard. Because I don’t do it all. At least never all at once.
This morning I got the kids to school early for lip-sync rehearsal (yes!) but realized that it was spirit day (no!) and I hadn’t done anything about that. I volunteer for field trips as much as I can, but sometimes I forget to fill out the forms and get that reminder note from the teacher.
Sometimes my kids are wonderful and use their manners and play fabulously and quietly (oh, how I like that) together. Other days they are rude and sulky and fight with each other over the most inane things.
Sometimes I stick to the meal-plan for the week and I am the lunchbox superstar. Other weeks I spend more than my food budget on eating take-out or pre-prepped meals and we scrounge for lunchbox eats.
There is always more work to do. Some weeks I have a packed teaching schedule and can still jam out three articles or posts. Other weeks I keep moving my to-do lists to the next day and the next and the next.
I’m organized in so many areas of my life, and utterly hopeless at keeping other areas straight (please don’t ask my husband about my taxes…)
Some weeks I see friends and feel all social. Other weeks I am a homebody and make any excuse not to leave the house.
You might visit my house one Thursday and it’s tidy and clean. The next Thursday you might walk in the door and wonder how any human could live with the mess.
Some weekends I’m energetic and game for sledding, snowman-building nature walks, and any outdoor fun. And sometimes I’d rather throw on a cartoon for the kids and have an afternoon nap.
Sometimes I train for a triathlon, and some days I just want to curl up on the couch and read.
There are nights when I’m in bed by ten, and I get a good solid seven hours sleep. There are also nights when I channel my university student days and don’t get to bed until long after midnight.
Some days I blow dry my hair (well, okay, rarely), and other days it’s permanently fixed in a ponytail.
Some days I’m the picture of calm and zen, and on other days I resemble more of a screaming banshee.
In my world, there really is no doing it all, at least not at the same time. I think life would be really boring if there weren’t at least a few dropped balls. So help me bust this myth. Instead, let’s just herald the fact that we’re all doing the best we can. Put your energy into being the best you can, with the conditions you are given.
Then curl up with a good book, and maybe even have a nap.