Ode to my Lingerie Draw Since university—while living on spaghetti and adrenaline—I’ve always had a drawer full of beautiful, expensive lingerie. It cusped on obsession. And this was before the Victoria Secret took the world by storm.
In my twenties, I swore up, down and sideways that unless it had to do with period-panties, I would NEVER under any conditions, ever, wear cotton undies.
Struck with The Baby Blues I suppose I’m lucky. I’ve dealt with mild depression for twenty years. Managed by an on-going regime of eating well, exercise and understanding what is happening, rather than fighting it.
With both babies my post-partum depression has come out suddenly—mostly when I’m exhausted—stays a while and then goes away. My world hasn’t been turned upside down because I’m used to depression; it’s more of a hugely inconvenient blip.
The Magnificent Jimmy Jane Candle Warm massage oil being dribbled onto and lovingly massaged into my tired naked body. This was the thought that I’ve fantasized, perhaps obsessed, about all week.
Intention. Such a little word with such big meaning.
I came to the startling realization this week that my sex life has always been and always will be ruled by my intentions (a bit of a Sexologist’s “Eureka” moment actually).
For the last six years, my life’s intention was to have a child. This intention was so strong that, at times, I was blinded to all else.
This love affair with natural herbal supplements started in those experimental days of University. I discovered how ginseng gives you pep, as well how St. John’s Wort is the only thing that will calm me down when I’m in the midst of an evil-PMS episode.
Week #3 of my Six Month Sex Challenge and because last week we focussed on my sexual needs, this week it's my husband's turn. Problem is I had a hernia and intercourse was out of the question. Just one more complication in trying to get sex back on track.
Lesson learned from last week: Having my sexual needs met won’t always be greeted enthusiasm. It seems unfair that sex always has to include intercourse in order for my husband to be satisfied...I really need to set a new sex precedent.
It's week #2 of my Six Month Sex Challenge. As a sex educator my entire MO is for women to ask for what they want in the bedroom. Therefore I remember it being crucial in this challenge for me to set the ground rules that sometimes 'sex' would be about what I wanted. What I didn't count on was that putting these expectations into place would be complicated. Meaning I had to put my foot down and make it happen which was unbelievably frustrating. Three years later, I'm glad I set this precident in our relationship.
It's Week #1 of my Six Month Sex Challenge and I'm all fired up and ready to have sex. I had a plan to initiate sex...or at least I thought I had a plan. It turned out to be lesson #1 for having sex after baby: It's really difficult to get into a sexual groove so couples just have to persever and wing-it.
About two years ago I decided to go on this crazy adventure which I called "The Six-Month Sex Challenge." I learned a lot but more importantly, it started a discussion with parents on what kind of sex is realistic after your baby is born. So, in hopes that it will once again start a good discussion, I've decided to republish the blog series.
This past July I appeared on the Marilyn Denis show with three other (fantastic!) experts to do an hour long show on women's sexuality and learned something new from every segment. A big shout out to Marilyn Denis for putting this show together!
You've probably heard that our brain is our biggest sex organ. So an easy way to get in themood when you're busy running around all day and have zero energy is...to create positive sexual anticipation.
Sexual desire refers to the thoughts you have about sex before, during, and after. And it can have a profound impact on the quality (and quantity) of your sexual experience.
It's assumed that it's always a woman whose sex drive is lagging. But both men and women are susceptible to and suffer from periods of low sex drive.
So what can you do if your guy's sex drive has taken a nose dive; you know he's not cheating, so what could it be?
Contrary to popular belief, men aren't always the horn-dogs they're made out to be. In fact, many times just the opposite is true and it's the female in the relationship who is has a higher sex drive.
In the 1950s and 60s, Masters and Johnson studied sexual function in 700 people who agreed to have their sex or self-pleasure watched under close scientific scrutiny.
The researchers measured bodily responses and studied the vagina during orgasm by placing a camera in a clear plastic penis.
One important contribution was defining the four-stage model of sexual response, which they described as the human sexual response cycle defined as:
There is nothing like spending a few hours absorbed in a good book. Especially if that book has a solid plot line, believable characters, and a pull-at-your-heartstrings romance.
Here are my top five romantic books to indulge your romantic side.
When was the last time you bought a sexy pair of underwear? Take each other shopping for sexy lingerie to set a spark.
Whether actually going to a store or doing it online make your sexy lingerie shopping trip that much more fun by having your partner tag along and help you pick something out.
Indulge in a lace teddy or silk boxer shorts. If you’re the adventurous type, try edible candy underwear.
This past July I appeared on the Marilyn Denis show with three other (fantastic!) experts to do an hour long show on women's sexuality and learned something new from every segment. A big shout out to Marilyn Denis for putting this show together!
