My son turned five in December, and is in senior Kindergarten at a school that's literally a stone's throw from my back door. I work from home, and have always felt so relieved that I'm here whenever I get a call from the school saying he needs me. Last year there were bumps to the head, a swallowed plastic fork tine, changes of clothes needed, and more. Every time that phone rings, and I see the school's name on the display, my heart sinks and my stomach turns. I always answer with a timid, "Hello?" hoping it isn't the call that tells me my son has had an allergic reaction.
This Is What It's Like Parenting An Allergic Child
Mason has always been socially reserved. His transition to school was rough, and he doesn't want us to drop him off at friend's birthday parties. He likes us to stay close by so he can feel assured he's not alone. He's basically the opposite of his big sister who has been happily independent since she burst forth noisily from the womb. And honestly, we have been totally okay with this because really, as allergy parents, we worry constantly about his safety so being in close proximity helps ease the worry.
Mason self-carries an Allerject around his waist, and is aware of the symptoms of anaphylaxis. He's also really good about declining offers of food from anyone but us, and it's important to us that while he's aware, he's not fearful. We try to instill confidence in him, with the understanding that it's up to him (and us) to protect him against his allergens, not the world around us.
And you know what one of my biggest worries has been? Playdates. 10 Tips for Successful Playdates with an Allergic Child
We've always had his friends come to our house to play. It's Mason's comfort zone, and mine too, to be frank. I know the foods here, I'm comfortable with the kids playing out of my site because I know it's safe here. But he's five now, and it's time he spread those little wings, isn't it? So when he met a new friend at school who wanted Mason to play at his house, I swallowed the worries and followed my own advice. I spoke to the mom beforehand, and told Mason's little friend about his allergies, too. We talked about the Allerject, and why he wears it, and about foods he can't eat.
Mason was apprehensive when the day came -- he didn't want me to leave. So I stuck around for a chat with his friend's Mom for a little while, waiting for him to feel confident there. And you know what? He totally rocked that play date! After an hour, I told him I was leaving, and he was a-okay.
When he came home, he was so full of pride, it brought tears to my eyes. He had stayed alone! He had politely declined a snack, citing his food allergies! (I had checked out the snack and approved it, but he decided on his own that he would decline it.) He had thanked them for having him over!
Letting go is hard, and even harder when there are additional worries. I'm proud of myself for letting my little guy learn and play on his own, and I'm super proud of my brave little kid.
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