When it comes to getting your sh*t together, it’s often the ongoing/never-ending tasks that bog us down and hinder our ability to just do it. Things like cooking dinner, grocery shopping, and the dear-heaven-does-it-ever-end laundry.
Who says, “I can’t wait to get home and tuck into a huge pile of smelly, sweat-damp clothes because lugging heavy swaying baskets down the stairs or to the laundromat REALLY completes me?”
People who need to seriously reassess their lives, that’s who.
The best tip I can give you about getting your (laundry) sh*t together is this: accept your laundry reality. There will always be laundry. Embrace it or go naked, and that’s not really an option given our Canadian climate. Think about how great clean clothes feel against your skin. We all know the feeling of crisp clean sheets at night – that feeling should be your daytime, too!
Okay; let’s get this sh*t done.
IMAGE SOURCE: COURTESY OF JENI MARINUCCI
Stop Doing It.
But didn’t you just say… No. I said YOU should stop doing it. I didn’t say your kids or partner should. I am completely serious. Sometimes adulting means task control and delegation and if your kids know colours and are tall enough to turn a washer on without falling in, laundry can be their job. Here’s a trick for non-readers, or if you have an overly complicated machine - and some of the laundry appliances today require an aeronautical engineering degree to operate - put brightly coloured stickers on the cycles dials and knobs should be turned to for standard loads.
Show “participants” how to load appropriate amounts of clothing to machines and how to use a soap dispenser. Turn all dials to GO and guess what? After a few days of management, you’re sipping tea while it’s still hot – in clean track pants, no less! Your kids can do way more than you think, I promise.
Start here; we’ll conquer meal prep in a future post.
IMAGE SOURCE: COURTESY OF JENI MARINUCCI
Really Hate Laundry? Really Stop Doing it.
Chances are you are over-washing your clothes. Give fibers a break and skip the wash when it’s not necessary. You can refresh fabrics by hanging near a window or outside as the weather permits, or use the freezer trick for blue jeans. You should always hit stains (I like OxiClean), but anything that isn’t actually dirty isn’t actually…dirty. Try to cut back even a load a week but this one doesn’t apply to teens because angst sweat and needs soap and water.
IMAGE SOURCE: MELISSABROCK1 VIA FOAP
Dye Your Faded Clothes Black
Black clothes in particular take a beating in the wash. It’s hard to maintain a level of street cred when your motorcycle jeans are more “cuddly gray teddy bear” than “Skull-Crackin’ Black,” but I can help you with this. For entirely black articles – so, no logos, patterns, or additional colours or coloured stitching – you can over-dye once a year. Purchase a top-quality black fabric dye, usually found at fabric and craft stores or online. First, treat any stains properly to ensure even dye distribution and wash in hottest water fabrics can handle. Then follow instructions for specific fabrics on bottle and wear gloves.
Congratulations! Those just-like-new yoga pants you’re wearing tell the world you just achieved new levels of getting your sh*t together.
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Do a Load a Day and Label
Saturdays are meant to be spent wearing clean pajamas, watching Netflix, and eating queso dip - not crying alone in a damp basement laundry room. Do one load a day and no longer are you a prisoner to laundry on Saturdays. Make quick work of special laundry cases by keeping a handful of clothes pegs with your hamper so you can quickly label things that need handwashing, cold wash, or to be hung dry. Give these pegs to everyone in house so you can avoid mistakenly throwing items into the washer and dryer without pre-treatment, since the dryer can flat out ruin favourite articles of clothing.
I also keep a bottle of MaxForce Foam Laundry Pre-Treater in my hamper because you can use it and leave it for up to seven days before washing, which also makes it great for travel. I’ve used OxiClean™ for over 10 years and it has yet to disappoint me, and I say this whilst having kids who wear white school uniform shirts and who cannot eat lunch without looking like they fought a guy in a diner dumpster. This sh*t works. (And it smells fab.)
IMAGE SOURCE: COURTESY OF JENI MARINUCCI
Purge Your Closet
Go into your closet.
Take everything out.
Throw away 50% of it, and hang remainder back up.
Repeat.
It’s that easy. Look, I don’t know you, and I haven’t seen what’s in your closet (skeletons or otherwise), but I can say with some level of surety that you have too much stuff. Too much clothing means too much laundry. Pitch stuff now according to these criteria:
1. Stained beyond repair, ripped, too small.
2. Unflattering or attached to a bad memory
3. Anything jeans beyond the 6th pair
3. Bridesmaids dresses
IMAGE SOURCE: MIRANDAP VIA FOAP
Dry Cleaning = Cry Cleaning
Forget dry cleaning; hand washing is where it’s at! There’s nothing better than a fresh, stain free piece of clothing that didn’t cost you a fortune to have dry cleaned in order to be worn. Handwashing is fast and simple and actually sort of zen-like when you do it right (aka not wearing woolen skirts and crouched over a steaming wooden tub of dangerous lye soap.)
Plus, almost anything can be hand washed if you do it properly and gently. Hit any stains with a generous spraying of OxiClean™ MaxForce™ Spray, which is great for handwashing because it’s likely that by the time you get shirt to sink, you’ve forgotten what caused any stains. MaxForce spray solves that issue because it’s made for 5 different types of stains. Is it blood or Merlot? No matter!
IMAGE SOURCE: COURTESY OF JENI MARINUCCI
Hang ‘Em High
You’re a grown up. You should own a clothesline and clothes pegs like your elders did. Tip: If you hang your towels to dry, give them a tumble in the dryer for a few minutes before folding. If not, you can skip the shower entirely and just use the crispy towels to sand the dirt off.
IMAGE SOURCE: COURTESY OF JENI MARINUCCI
Throw Away Odd Socks
This one is very important, so listen closely, and use a gentle lecture-y voice when reading my words:
You have a life to live. These odd socks are pinning you down. Don’t you want a life of adventure? These socks are what prevents that from happening. Throw them out. You already have kids and pets and a job and partners and family to hold you back. An additional 46 unmatched socks ranging from newborn bootie to size 13 wool work sock is an anchor around your neck. If their mates were in the house you would have found them already. Take your unmatched sock basket and TURF IT. Welcome to your new life.
Life doesn’t happen in the laundry room, friends. Set yourself free.
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