Watch a service dog guide a woman with vision impairment through a crowded street and it isn’t difficult to see how this dog provides her with greater freedom. Observe a dog getting a set of dropped keys for a man in a wheelchair and it is clear how this dog makes his life better. See a young child with autism, who has a tendency to wander or bolt, tethered to a dog and the safety the animal provides that little one and her family is easily apparent.
These are just a few ways service dogs support people with various medical and physical challenges. But it isn’t always so obvious how service dogs help their partners.
This fall, thanks to the Lions Foundation of Canada Dog Guides, we were incredibly fortunate to have Abel join our family as my son’s Autism Assistance Dog Guide. Our family waited patiently for two years for this wonderful dog to come into our lives; it can take a while as there is high demand for these special dogs.
My kid is a super energetic and fun loving eight year-old boy. He’s hilarious. He’s a fantastic singer and dancer. His favourite subject is math and he loves sports— especially hockey, soccer, and baseball. He also has a form of high functioning autism known as Asperger syndrome.
There is a well known quote that says, “If you’ve met one person with autism, you’ve met one person with autism.” As autism is a spectrum disorder, it affects people in many different ways and looks very different from person to person. For kids with Asperger’s or high functioning autism, like my son, it isn’t always obvious that they have a neurodevelopmental disorder. It is often called an invisible disability.
As we take Abel around with us wherever we go, we frequently encounter questions about our dog, how he helps our kid and what exactly he does for him. It can go a little like this:
Here are five amazing ways Abel helps my kid and how his life is better with Abel in it.
My kid can be loud and intense. His Asperger’s makes it challenging for him to control his impulses, to manage transitions, and to regulate himself. It also means that he can easily get over stimulated, overly excited, worked up — and have a very hard time bringing himself back down. Enter the big, white, beautiful, most relaxed, most sweet, most patient, stoic Abel.
That calmness has an effect on my son. When you see him gently stroking Abel’s soft fur and relaxing under the pressure of his dog laying up against him, it is clear that this relationship reduces his anxiety, frustration and aggression. Abel grounds him, now and for years to come.
In the past, my son didn’t want to talk about having Asperger’s or share that information with others. But having Abel has changed this, by helping him become more comfortable with opening up the conversation with his classmates and their parents about Asperger’s and autism.
Giving his peers more information about it has made it easier for them to understand why there might be times when he has a hard time giving them appropriate personal space or controlling his impulses when he’s in a chaotic situation or when he’s excited or frustrated.
When we go to school everyday, we bring Abel with us. I bring my son right into the school and directly up to his classroom for drop offs in the morning and after lunch, so Abel is in and around the school a lot. The kids are all really curious about him.
They know that when the dog has his vest on, that he is not to be petted as he is focusing on his job. But often, my kid wants to share his dog with his friends. We take off the working vest and the other children are invited to get a little petting time. They are all excited to have this “special” time with a “special” dog and my son is so happy to be able to connect with his friends over his dog.
Right after we got Abel and I had him with me at school one morning, one of my son’s classmates—who has known him since kindergarten and is very familiar with him—asked me how Abel helps. I told her that when he gets frustrated he can go to Abel and Abel will help him calm down and feel better. She had a bit of an “aha” moment and looked up at me and said “Oh! That’s a really good idea!”
Seeing my son with his dog at times during the day is visual reminder to make it easier for them to accept all of his challenges for what they are and improves his relationships with them.
It is difficult for an eight year-old to understand what it means to have autism. He can’t yet see how his thinking differently is part of what makes him so extraordinary. He only knows the challenges and frustrations he faces every day, the negative impact of having autism. This has been weighing on him.
But Abel has turned this around. He now has something incredibly positive and special in his life BECAUSE he has autism. Having Abel is opening him up to better understand how his mind works and allowing him to work towards being proud of all of the parts of who he is. He is now more open to learning more about his strengths and challenges and accepting himself. Abel is greatly impacting his self-esteem.
For the first six months to a year, the main job of an Autism Assistance Dog Guide and his child is to form a significant bond. My son and Abel have done just that.
Every night, the two of them jump into bed and Abel flops over on his back, long legs going out in every direction, so that his kid can give him a good belly rub before they go to sleep together. They totally love each other and are special companions, playmates, partners in crime, best friends.
I recently asked my son how Abel makes him feel. His response was, “He makes me feel comfortable.” Most of us likely take feeling comfortable for granted. But for many kids with autism comfortable is a much, much more elusive feeling. And if Abel makes him feel comfortable, well then, this dog is amazing at his job.
It costs approximately $25,000 to raise and train an Autism Assistance Dog Guide. The Lions Foundation of Canada Dog Guides program provides dogs to eligible Canadians at no cost to the recipients. We can’t thank them enough for this incredible gift that is making such a positive impact in my son's life.
We are doing what we can to help raise awareness for the amazing work that they do and help raise funds, too. This Sunday, we’ll be joining our local Purina Walk for Dog Guides. If you want to donate or participate in this annual national fundraising walk that supports the Lions Foundation of Canada Dog Guides, it is happening in communities across Canada on Sunday, May 31st.
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