Last night, I was fluttering around Twitter in the twenty minutes of peace and quiet that I get in our home on the nights daddy puts the little one to bed, when I spotted something about a post on YMC going "viral." Viral—that's a strong word, so I had to find out more. I headed on over here and read the post, The Gift of Not Giving a Thing. I was more than a little surprised. Viral is typically reserved for content that is shocking or controversial. I just wasn’t seeing it.
Here’s a mom talking about the fact that her kids have more than they need and moving forward with the idea that she would prefer her boys get “gifts” rather than presents. "Gifts" not necessarily being tangible items but more like opportunities to create memories, etc. Seems pretty reasonable and sane to me; certainly not the kind of content that causes a stir. BUT it did. And it wasn’t until I started reading the comments that I started to get it.
This mom made a choice (and let’s be frank here, she may not stick to it) to cut back on the material things that her boys get but don’t really need. That doesn’t make her a better mom than you! AND—this is important—she doesn’t think she’s a better mom than you. I promise you she doesn’t. I’m a mom. My child is spoiled, so spoiled. She just has to look at me with those baby blues, and I whip out my wallet and she owns whatever thing it was she was laying on the charm to get. That’s how I roll. And reading about another parent who is saying to heck with all the “stuff” doesn’t offend me. I don’t see it as a personal attack against me and my spoiled child.
You see, I also am just as likely to whip out my wallet to fill a shopping bag full of food for the food bank or write a check for our sponsored child, and she sees that, too. So for me, it’s all good. My kid is sweet (except when she’s not) and compassionate and has a ton of stuff, and will continue to get a ton of stuff. I’m okay with that. My husband and I teach her lessons in our own way. We have our ideals and we stick to them. We don’t try and live up to anyone else’s, and we don’t feel that other parent’s look down on us for the choices we make. We just muddle through this parenting gig the best we can. Just like you: no better, no worse.
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