This is How You Ask About Your Kid's Day Without Asking About Their Day

Turns out, when you ask is just as important as how you ask.

When I sent my first son off to kindergarten, I had what can only be described as an ‘ah ha’ moment. (Correction; it was more of a “holy sh*t, I’ve been downsized and now somebody else is looking after my child who I’ve cared for full-time for the past 3 years and 10 months” moment.)

The realization hit me that he now had a whole other life outside of me, and damn if I didn’t want to know what was going on in that life.

For the first few years, the how was your day question was all I needed. He couldn’t wait to talk. In fact, there were days when I wished he’d shut up a bit. We’ll file that under ‘be careful what you wish for.’ Because as both my kids got older, how was your day was responded to with a “fine” and the sound of feet bounding up the stairs.

Day after day I would ask the same question and day after day, I would get the same response. That right there is the definition of insanity.

So, I changed the game and came up with some new questions.

But secondly, I began to wait until dinner to ask anything because it turns out after a full day of school, both boys really just wanted some downtime. Turns out, when you ask is just as important as how you ask.

No Consequence Questions:

These are question they can answer honestly without getting into trouble, so make sure you are 100% certain you won’t do a 180 and ground them.

  • What did you throw out instead of eating today?
  • On a scale of 1 to 10 how likely is there to be a health inspector sent to your locker/desk?
  • If I was going to get a call from one of your teachers who would it be and why?

What’s Going On Questions:

These are the questions that will give you insight into their day.

  • Where do you hang out at recess?
  • Your teacher has three words to describe you: What are they?
  • If you could choose who to sit with in your class, who would it be?
  • How would you describe (insert teacher’s name here).

Find Out What Sucks Questions:

  • If you could cancel one class for the year, which one would it be. Why?
  • Does anyone in your class have a hard time following the rules?
  • What rules at school do you feel are unfair? (But also let them know you can’t change those rules and they still need to be respected).

Just for Fun:

Today my theme song would have been (insert song name here). What was yours?

  • If you were going to teach a class, what would it be?
  • Which teacher has a teaching style you like the best?
  • Describe your day using the name of a TV show.

You may not get answers all the time, but I guarantee you’ll get more than a fine.




RELATED: An Ages & Stages Real-World List to Get Kids Ready to Own the School Year