How To Be A Good Conversationalist

Integrating yourself into a conversation can be intimidating. On the outside you attempt to appear confident as you approach a group of strangers, inside your inner voice is all, “What if I say something stupid?” or “They all know each other, why would they want to talk to me?”Having a conversation with friends and friends-to-be needn’t be difficult if you follow these tips.

Be Confident
Don’t let that inner voice get the best of you. Approach a group of people with confidence knowing YOU are an interesting person who has interesting things to say.  

OMG, It’s <Fill In The Blank>!
There she is. You spot a person you’ve always wanted to meet across the room but how do you approach her? Easy peasy slice o’ cheesy: Walk over, smile, extend your hand and simply introduce yourself.

A “Hi, I’m <so-and-so>. I've wanted to meet you and thought I'd take this opportunity to introduce myself.

Ask Questions
People like to talk about themselves and asking open-ended questions is the best way to get to know a person better.

What’s an open-ended question? Any question that can’t be answered with a yes or a no.

Listen To The Answers
Many times when someone is else is talking we’re so busy formulating a response in our head we’re not fully listening. The best conversationalists are actually people who are good listeners. Take the time to really hear what the person is saying, focus on his words and use body language to communicate you’re attentive. Then go back to the tip above and ask more questions related to what they are saying.

Relax!
Nobody is judging you! Smile, have fun, make jokes…the more relaxed you are the easier it is to connect with everyone around you.

Be Welcoming
Put out there what you’d like to receive in return. When someone walks over and introduces herself to you, give that person your full attention. If you see someone off to the side who looks like they may need a friend, invite them over into your group. If you do have to rush off to be somewhere else at that particular moment, let her know you need to be somewhere but would love to connect later on.

Be Yourself
The best person to have a conversation with is the person who is completely at ease being herself.

Being you is the best way to do that.