mike-reynolds-dad-outside-the-lines

I’m the kind of person who gets angry at the ads Facebook targets me with.

“I don’t want to see this!” I yell at my screen. “If I wanted to look at nail polish for men I’d just Google it!”

I understand these ads are based completely on my browsing history and that I shouldn’t get upset when I see an ad for a Chewbacca One Piece Pajama and I shouldn’t message my partner when a Recommended Page comes up for “growing your arms because they aren’t very big as they are,” but I do get upset and I do message my partner about how angry I am. But what if these ads or page suggestions had some value to me as a parent? Is there any ad I could possibly be shown that would get me clicking? Something beyond a tuxedo for our cat or ways to get rid of the crow’s feet around my eyes? I think they exist:

Holy crap, you’re doing okay

For less than a cup of coffee a day you can be sent a positive affirmation every time you mutter, or yell, or write on the wall of your child’s bedroom wall “I can’t do this any more,” or “I’m a terrible parent.” This page is here to show you that what you thought you were doing really poorly is actually you doing something really well.

It’s a page that when boiled down to it, can be summed up with: parenting is hard.

There’s no minimum amount of Pinterest projects you need to do in a day to qualify as a good parent. There’s also no maximum number you can do before you’re a bad one. I know good parents who make amazing lunchbox meals and know great parents who consider using a cookie cutter on a lunch sandwich a big stretch (it’s me).

This parent’s kids cry too

Every time you’re out in a restaurant you’re pointing at other kids saying “look at them; be quiet like them,” as your kids stand on the table with their dinner knives tucked into the back of their shirts like arrows.

This page is full of “them” acting like your kids act. They’re crying in toy stores, they’re crying in libraries, they’re crying two minutes into a family holiday dinner. They’re crying everywhere! Because that’s what kids do, even if at that moment your kids are dancing on the ceiling it doesn’t look like they are.

These people have never slept either, you can still do things good

I hate sleep. Or, you’d think, if you ever looked at my sleep patterns, that I hate sleep. I actually love sleep but am aware that until my kids reach the age where they don’t do anything but sleep, I’m in a do what I can do cycle. But what the hell can you do without sleep! This page gives us an historical look at what other non-sleepers have been able to accomplish.

How to turn your wall into crayon instead of trying to get the crayon off your wall

Sometimes you need reminders it’s okay to think outside the box. You also need to read long, detailed instructions to force your mind to think of something that isn’t “how long are they going to behave this way for?”

Wouldn’t it be nice if we weren’t expected to have everything look perfect when other people stopped by? They’d walk in and compliment us on having food on the floor that looked good enough for them to eat. Or a laundry pile that really complimented the colour of the sofa.