Rupaul's Drag Race just ended its 5th season and I'm more hooked than I ever have been. From Alaska's high-pitched HIEEE yell to Jinkx Monsoon's vintage-inspired looks...wait. You've never seen Drag Race? Oh my word.
The brainchild of Supermodel of the World RuPaul, the show has brought drag queens to the forefront of reality television. It's like Showgirls meets Striptease meets Miss America that then got blended with a Las Vegas show...and it's a show that I can't recommend to people enough. If you ever have a conversation with me, expect that at least SOME of the lingo below will be thrown in for good measure (for friends who don't watch the show, I often confuse the hell out of them when I pepper conversations with some of these phrases).
Pageant Queen - A drag queen who performs in Drag Balls or Pageants as opposed to stage.
Comedy Queen - A queen who does comedy routines. Think of Dame Edna.
Don't F*ck It Up! - What Ru reminds the contestants during the final challenge each week (I say this one a lot for no good reason other than I LOVE it).
Condragulations - A congratulatory exclamation, generally said by Ru to winners of each week's challenge.
Reading - The act of humorously insulting another queen. When queens start to read each other, Ru will say, "The library is open. Reading is fundamental."
Shade - Gossip. Often, during reading sessions, queens will exclaim, "The shade of it all!"
Rupologize - This one, I think, speaks for itself.
Work - Girl, you betta work! This is the BEST exclamation when you are giving friends support. Work!
Have I mentioned how absolutely gif-able this show is?
Yes, that's a contestant ripping her wig off to produce....ANOTHER WIG.
I think the thing I love the most about Drag Race is that we live in a world where queens can become reality stars, and that these performers can find acceptance and love from their families where they may have missed it before.
So, if you are looking for something absolutely hilarious to watch after you tuck the kiddies in at the end of one of these long summer days (notice how much LONGER the days seem when you have to keep a child entertained all day?) Check out Drag Race, especially if you like your shows to end with a fashion show and lip syncing competition, and like RuPaul says, you have the Charm, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent of a real queen (I'll let you figure that last one out for yourself).
So, spill it! Do you think you'll check out RuPaul's Drag Race?
Nearly every night around Henry’s bed time, I get my popcorn ready, grab a cup of peppermint tea and I spend some quality alone time while Matt gets a little shut eye before his graveyard shift (5 nights a week, in fact). So you’d think I would have this TV/Movie thing down by now, right? Nope. I turn on the same subscription thing we’ve got and watch either a documentary or a few episodes of a show. That’s it. And it’s not that I don’t relish my time alone, being able to watch what I want without having to negotiate with the hubs, but I found out recently that I’ve been really missing out on something much better than what I’ve been doing. It’s called Hollywood Suite and it’s not only surprisingly right up my alley, I think it will be right up yours, too.
Hollywood Suite is basically designed for parents like me and you. We love movies, but let’s get real – between kids, work schedules and money, getting out to the movies can seem like a virtual impossibility most nights. But watching movies on TV is probably the worst thing to do because they cut everything good out, either for time or “vulgarity” and there’s another commercial every 8 minutes. Commercial-free, to me, is really the only way to watch movies. But, there are really few options these days. We live in one of the remaining neighbourhoods in Toronto with a full-service video store…but rentals are $6 a piece! Nevermind HD or BluRay. So, it’s either of these two options or online-only subscription services. Which are inexpensive, but what if my game console breaks? I can’t watch movies on my tablet.
This is why I’m embarrassed to say that until recently I had no idea what Hollywood Suite had to offer – they give us commercial free movies over four channels PLUS an on-demand channel for cheaper than an online subscription service. WTF, me? Hollywood Suite was invented for me and I totally had no idea what it was or why it was valuable until very recently. I could be watching so much more than depressing documentaries or FX shows that are 5 years old. And nights that Matt is off? Bigger bowl of popcorn and I might consider letting him choose what we watch.
And it’s pretty clear that they have parents in mind in their programming because they do theme days and weekends — upcoming? Mom’s the Word, a Mother’s Day movie marathon with 12 different movies running across the four channels on Mother’s Day. But they aren’t just Mrs. Doubtfire or some over-the-top-we-think-moms-like-this-in-a-stereotypical-way kind of movies. These are actually good. Across the four channels this upcoming Mother’s Day, Hollywood Suite is offering these twelve movies:
Warner Films – Dolores Claiborne, The Exorcist, Striptease
MGM – Throw Momma From The Train, Baby Boom, Mr. Mom
Sony – Hush, A Cry in the Dark, Stepmom
AXN – The Juror, The Manchurian Candidate, Silent Hill
See what I mean? How wickedly warped would it be to watch a triple bill of Dolores Claiborne, The Exorcist AND Striptease (full disclosure, I love Striptease in all its super cheesy glory)? And Throw Momma From The Train? That’s my idea of a “Mother’s Day” movie. If these are your idea of great film fare (and really, who wouldn’t love these classics, even Dads should be pleased?), I think Hollywood Suite is just the package for you. And to share all the comedy, drama and warped love of film, I’ve got a contest for you, courtesy of Hollywood Suite…and it’s just in time for Mother’s Day. Sweet.
Because Hollywood Suite loves moms so much they want to give one lucky YMC member a Mom Makeover prize pack valued at $600!
One winner will receive a grand prize of a $300 gift card toward an Aveda makeover, a $200 gift card for a new outfit purchased at Reitmans, and a Hollywood Suite Gift Pack including four DVD movies and other fun Hollywood Suite stuff.
All you have to do to enter is share which "Mom's the Word" movie you want to see and why in the comments section below.
You have until May 31, 2013 to enter. You must be a YMC member and please be sure you've registered your email address in our commenting system so we can contact you if you win.
This is proudly sponsored by our friends at Hollywood Suite.
www.hollywoodsuite.ca
Last week, actress Jessica Alba publicly admitted that in order to "quickly" loose weight after having her second child, she decided that her best course of action was to use a double-corset, tightly attached to her body for 3 full months. 24/7. For 90 days. Not only did she do that for real, she admits to it.
What. The. Fuck.
I feel like I JUST blogged about how irresponsible the media are for making women feel like absolute garbage simply for being mothers. Now, we're being told that starvation, discomfort and pain are necessary to have a pre-baby body. In 3 months. It takes 9 months to create life, something we've been doing since the dawn of time, but now, because of stories like this, the pressure is mounting to get that weight off faster and more irresponsibly than ever.
And how is it even remotely possible to care for a newborn while in a double corset without nannies, cooks, house keepers and the like?
OH WAIT, IT'S NOT. IT'S NOT EVEN REMOTELY POSSIBLE.
And a bunch of corset companies are now jumping on this declaration of "it was definitely worth it!" by promoting their wares to new mothers. Women who are exhausted, overwhelmed, fragile and stressed right out. As Erica recently said to me, "I don't know about you, but this grosses me out."
Yep. It grosses me out. It grosses me out and bothers me and makes me feel like I'm living in some kind of bizarro world where women are expected to be as thin as celebrities but without the money that they need in order to achieve the impossible standards set about for them.
And it also makes me feel like when I'm all out of rage, here comes another wave of it. Ladies, we need to stop making each other feel bad about every little thing. You never see men treating each other this way. We don't hear of men browbeating, humiliating and shaming other men for being differently shaped. Men don't expect other men to never change in appearance as they age, as they become fathers and as they mature. Why are we constantly doing this to each other? If we can't treat ourselves as equal and throw away all of these bullshit expectations, we won't ever have equality.
And please, for the love of all that is holy, don't you dare even consider corseting post-baby. Enjoy life. Eat a piece of cake. Go for a stroll with the fam. And stop expecting perfection, because it's our imperfections that make us all beautiful.
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