I snuck in to The Art of Leadership conference late and spotted my colleagues who had saved a seat for me. "How are you doing?" one asked me. Before I could say the words, tears were already tumbling down my cheeks. "I'm exhausted," I replied, wiping my eyes. She hugged me and said what too many of my working friends are feeling. "Me too; I'm drowning."
Of course misery loves company, but the irony of this conversation was that the next speaker to take the stage was Arianna Huffington, publisher of Huffington Post, who is on a mission to address this modern plague of business burnout. Several comments she made really resonated, so much so that I am trying to put some of her thoughts into action. I'm guessing that if I'm struggling, a whole bunch of my friends are too. So I'm writing this for all of us to use as a guideline to pull ourselves from the brink of a breakdown.
ARIANNA SAYS: "Sleep your way to the top"
Sleep is one of Arianna's obsessions. Just a few years ago, she was so sleep deprived and overworked that she literally fell over, smashing her head and bashing in her cheek. She was rushed to the hospital and endured many tests to find out why she would suddenly pass out with no warning. A diagnosis of exhaustion made her realize she had to change her lifestyle and redefine success. Like Arianna we've become a society of workaholics, living in front of our computers 24/7. It's starting to catch up with us and take a toll on our health and productivity.
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WHAT I'M DOING ABOUT IT: Bedtime for me is inching closer down to 10 pm, which is moments after my fourteen year old grudgingly hits the sack. I'm quitting my late night work earlier and my cell phone is OFF.
WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: Make sleep a priority. Make it part of your job description. If your kids are waking you a lot during the night, share some of the responsibility with your partner. Go to bed earlier rather than catching up on your ex-boyfriend's Facebook status. And how many episodes of "The Walking Dead" do you really have to binge-watch late into the night? It will catch up with you. Go to sleep. If the night time isn't long enough for you, grab a nap. Arianna is a big proponent of nap rooms in companies. If you're like me and work from home, you already have a nap room with your name on it.
ARIANNA SAYS: "We should pay as much attention to our own batteries as we do to our phones. Recharge. Listen to your body."
I never leave the house without my phone's battery charged, even though I'm running on empty from too little sleep after a late night on the computer, no effort to eat a healthy breakfast, and giving up my exercise class to make a meeting. And work, work, work.
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Can you relate?
WHAT I'M DOING ABOUT IT: I've upped my exercise. A few times a week I book off time to workout at Ferris 360 - an awesome cross fit studio right in my hood that trains people from their 20's to their 80's. Seriously - on Thursdays I work out with a group of women between the ages of 60 and 80 and they kick my butt. I'm paying more attention to my morning meals and taking time to enjoy it.
WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: Make yourself a priority more often. Join a gym or go for long brisk walks. I don't like skiing so I go snowshoeing while my kids ski. Eat a healthy breakfast. Find time for a protein rich lunch. Have a nap....or sex. Or both. A sick mother or a sick employee is not as valuable as a healthy, happy one.
ARIANNA SAYS: "Multitasking is actually task switching and it's the least productive thing we can do."
This isn't the first time I've heard that multi-tasking - a skill I've been quite proud of - is actually detrimental to my mind. The idea of talking on the phone while typing an email and sipping a coffee seems like a smart use of one's time. In fact, your mind can technically focus on only one task at a time, which stands to reason that none of your tasks done simultaneously are being done well. Not to mention the fact that our brains are become exhausted by constantly jumping from task to task without a break.
And it's tiring us out. And making us forgetful. Sound familiar?
A few months ago I sat front row to hear behavioural neuroscientist Daniel Levitin talk about our over-burdened brains from his new book The Organized Mind. He explained how a switch from one task to another burns up glucose, releases stress hormones, and takes time between the task-switching. In short, multi-tasking is hurting our productivity.
WHAT AM I DOING ABOUT IT: Step away from the computer. That's my new mantra. During the day I'm consciously walking away from my work. In a weird synchronistic turn of events, we recently bought a bird (crazy, I know) as a family pet. Since I'm home all the time (working), guess who Bazoopee the bird has bonded with? ME! In many ways, it was a gift from the feathered gods. Now I stop what I'm doing to hang out with Bazoopee, feed her, and listen to her purr on my shoulder. I've become a bit of a bird lady and I'm less stressed because of it.
WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: Be aware of how long you're sitting in front of your computer. Then STOP. Do something else. Make something to eat. Go out for a coffee. Call a friend (without looking at your computer). Read the newspaper. Play with your pet. Workout for ten minutes. Do nothing. Seriously, do anything to let your brain recalibrate and then focus on the next task at hand.
ARIANNA SAYS: 'When they take the baby out, they put the guilt in."
Truer words, right? Arianna made this comment when she was asked by an audience member on how she reconciles being a mom and an extremely busy business woman. She spoke to the idea of the importance of women giving themselves permission to be inspired and fulfilled in their careers. I think she also spoke to the importance of women being strong role models for their kids (Disclaimer: I was really exhausted during her talk so I may be projecting here).
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WHAT I'M DOING ABOUT IT: I am leaving my family for NINE DAYS to go on an adventure with my mummy. Seriously, two days after hearing Arianna speak, my mom was over and invited me to go with her on an all expenses paid Romantic Danube Riverboat Cruise from Nuremberg to Budapest with Viking River Cruises. You know what I said? NO! Crazy, right? I literally put my hand in my hands and mumbled something like "I can't leave my family and my business" between exhausted sobs. Even I know I was pathetic. Not right in the head. My husband was looking at me like I was nuts. "You have GOT to go!" he said. "We'll be fine." But, ah, the guilt.
So I'm off! I fly to Eastern Europe today with my mom to spend a week floating along the Danube River experiencing Christmas Markets without kids, husband, or any work responsibility. I'm a little apprehensive, but I'm giving my husband the respect to assume he and my kids WILL be fine without me for nine days. I hope they miss me!
WHAT YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT: Make sure you make some time for yourself in the coming weeks and months. Book off time for a getaway - long haul or short- it doesn't matter. Do something that gets you out of your regular daily grind. Slip out to the spa. Buy some glitter makeup. Colour your roots. Sneak out for a dinner with your girlfriends or date night with your man. Go for a run.
We deserve it. More importantly, we need it. Now go get some sleep - you'll feel better; Arianna told me so.
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