So you might have wondered if I crawled under a rock since posting my Baby Blues confessional last week. Actually, I crawled into my social network. Once word spread that I was having some challenges with new baby, big kids and balancing life the tweeps, peeps and friends stepped up.
First off, thanks for all the supportive comments to that post. Also, the How are you doing today? tweets I am still getting. It takes a few minutes for you - but absolutely makes a new mom's day reading she is not alone in the world. Thank you guys!
So I have learnt, in my own way, to ask for help...I gently nudged on my Facebook status: There is a special place in heaven for people who bring food to families with newborns. And voila! Dinners, lunches and baked goods were all delivered with smiles, hugs, a peek of the boy.
Realizing I am quite the momzilla in the evenings (when tired big kids - who themselves are adjusting to the shift in attention to a new brother - want their moms the most) I've decided to ask for evening help. Instead of dh working late or teaching karate classes - he is home holding the boy - or doing homework with the girls. Such a relief to have another grown-up helping duing the arsenic hours.
I've also tried my hand (well, it wasn't actually my hand) at expressing milk so that boy can have a bottle and I can get at least one 4hr block of sleep. (there's a post on that to come).
And today, a pd day (good ghandi) I've asked for the grandparents to take the big kids sledding this afternoon so I can have a rest.
10 years ago, with my first baby - I insisted on doing it all. Over the years, I've realized I can't do it all. And I shouldn't try. There already is a Martha Stewart who does everything perfectly...and look what happened to her (jailbird!). I'm no Martha. I'm me.
And I'm asking for help - when needed - and lowering the bar - as needed. So I don't need to crawl under any rocks.
Upon the birth of her new baby - a Facebook friend wrote her status as: "I knew there would be a lot of crying in the house with a new baby...I just didn't realize the tears would be my own". I, Activity Mummy, gave birth to our son 7 days ago, and the tears have been flowing ever since - however I wouldn't call them joyful. Is this the baby blues I've read about?...
I cry in the shower. For no reason. A big wave of blue comes over me in an instant and I cry. I have three happy, healthy, beautiful children. A great husband. A nice life. And I'm crying in the shower. WTH?!?
And I'm snapping at the kids. I don't usually snap at them. I'm not a snapper. But when that wave of blue hits I can't help myself. (and it secretly, deep down, feels good...am I horrible?)
And during the blue waves, I feel utterly alone in the world. Even though I'm surrounded with all these humans whom I grew from scratch. Despite having my husband home during these 1st days with our son. This had better be the baby blues because otherwise I am one Mommy who tossed her priorities with the plancenta.
Now, I don't feel this way all the time - most of the time I am happy (and tired...and slightly mentally fuzzy from the tiredness...the little man nurses every 2 hours). And I realize that there are a whole lotta hormones wreaking havoc right now.
But as Shrek says "Better out than in" thus I'm sharing my baby blues. With you. With my family. Because I realize I'm not alone - it's just that silly blue wave. New mother's get the baby blues...even new-experienced-mothers like me. Right?...
So far, today, I'm keeping myself busy...like writing this post, starting the big kids with activities and cuddling that 7 day old boy-child...and so far no waves of blue.
So I'm putting this out there...have any of you experienced the baby blues? What did you do to keep the blue waves away?
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