Have you ever repeated a word so many times that it starts to sound strange and no longer feels like a real word? Well, that's how I feel about the word "why." Why, you ask? Because my son says it ten thousand times a day. Why? Because he's two and a half. This is what our conversations look like:
Cole: Why does that truck have a door, Mommy?
Me: So that the driver can get in and out of the truck.
Me: Because he can't live in the truck. He needs to get out sometimes.
Me: Because he might have to pee. Or eat. Or stretch his legs.
Me: It can get tiring sitting in one spot. It's a good idea to stretch.
Me: So your legs don't cramp up.
Me: Cuz leg cramps suck.
Me: Cuz they hurt.
Me: Something about lactic acid build up.
Me: Because the human body is complex and interesting, and I only took grade 11 biology. I don't know all the details.
Me: Because I decided to take drama in grade 12 instead.
Me: Because math and science were never really my thing. But that doesn't mean it won't be your thing. You can do whatever you'd like. Except if it's dangerous.
Me: Because I'm your Mommy, and I made you, and I want to keep you safe.
Me: Because I love you.
Me: I love you because you're kind, and adorable, and funny.
Me: Because you're my kid. You sort of have to be funny. It's a pre-requisite. Can you say pre-requisite?
Me: Very good. Hey, look! An ice-cream truck!
. . .
And that is how we end "why" conversations.
I need a nap.
To read more about my adventures in toddlerhood, check out "Do Your Toddlers Freak Out Over Weird Stuff Too?" and "My Toddler's Truck Addiction." And if you haven't already, please feel free to join my community Facebook page, "Jen Warman: Rants In My Pants."
Thanks for stopping by to check out the first installment of Rants In My Pants.
With these weekly rants, I'll be spouting off random shit that keeps me awake at night, but instead of writing about it, I'll be doing it in video form (it's good incentive for me to shower. And put on mascara...).
I hope you enjoy this first episode! And to be sure you don't miss any future episodes, don't forget to subscribe to YMC's YouTube channel. You can also join my new Facebook page, "Jen Warman: Rants In My Pants," where I'll be sharing links to anything and everything parenting related that I consider funny, in the hopes of one day making you laugh so hard you pee your pants... That's my goal in life people. Wet pants.
Tired Mom Alert: Exhaustion Can Make Us Do Crazy Things!
As an only child, I've always been fascinated with something I know nothing about from firsthand experience—sibling relationships. Any of my elementary school friends can attest to the fact that I was a very inquisitive (to the point of being annoying) only child. "What's it like to have a sister? Do you two share clothes? What is her favourite colour? Does she ever get mad at you? Does she have a diary? Have you read it?" Seriously. I was a mini investigative journalist at the age of 7, and my focus was entirely on sibling relationships. It fascinated me, and it still does.
Now, as a mother of two, it's so exciting for me to witness this relationship grow from day one. And I must say, I can understand more than ever the truth behind the effects of birth order. Despite my best efforts to give my children the same experiences and attention, there are some things that are just different for a second child, and there is nothing I can do about it.
So, second child, I'm sorry in advance, but here are a few things you should know:
RARELY WILL YOU GET MY UNDIVIDED ATTENTION, SECOND CHILD.
I'm sorry, but it's true. You will always have someone else nearby who is clamoring for my attention. Someone else will always need their bum changed, or a drink of juice, or a snack. So I will become the multi-tasking-master and will cradle you in my arms as I do all three of these above-mentioned tasks at once. But don't worry, I'll try not to get poop on you in the process.
MILESTONES? WHAT MILESTONES?
Second child, I'm pretty sure you're developing well, though I can't be certain. I keep forgetting to actually read those Baby Centre updates that are emailed to me. But if you're still lying on your back and sucking your big toe by your 5th Birthday, I promise to look into things. Deal?
YOU WILL LIKELY GET POKED IN THE EYE.
When you have an older sibling, second child, I think you just have to be a little more...resilient. They're going to hug you, and tackle you in the process. They're going to give you a "high five," but bend your arm awkwardly in the process. Oops. And from time to time, they will intentionally stomp on your fingers. Just cuz.
I HOPE YOU LIKE HAND-ME-DOWNS.
Fortunately for you, second child, I'd rather put more money into your RESP than buy you fashionable sleepers that you'll shit in and grow out of in 5 minutes. When you become a Doctor (no pressure), you can buy yourself all of the overpriced clothing your heart desires. In the meantime, it's a good thing you look good in blue, little girl. And how do you feel about dump trucks? Good.
But at the end of the day, second child, it's a small price to pay for the joy of having a sibling. Sure, you might have to yell a little louder to make sure your voice is heard, but a quiet house is boring and somewhat creepy. With a sibling around, there will always be someone to laugh out loud with during the day and whisper to in the wee hours past your bedtime. You have a built-in best friend, and a partner in crime. You have someone to roll your eyes to when your parents are embarrassing you (sorry, it'll happen), and someone to help you remember the joyful details of your childhood. Although there will be times that your sibling drives you crazy, please remember that they were one of the first people to kiss you and love you. They helped shape the person you are today, even if they were responsible for some of your scars...
Going to have a second baby soon? Help your toddler transition to having a new brother or sister with these 4 steps.
It's the new 'F-word.' Learn the damage having a favourite child can cause and practical solutions to help all your kids feel loved and unique.