You're eating me out of house and home. Remember that tired expression? Well, if the latest reports are anything to go by, you'll be saying it before long, as the cost of raising a kid through to adulthood today is crazier than ever—as in $250K kind of crazy.
According to an article in the Washington Post, by the time your beautiful baby turns 18, you will have spent $245,340 on "food, housing, childcare, education, and other expenses."
The US Department of Agriculture's new report (based on data from the Labor Department’s Consumer Expenditure Survey) shows a 1.8 percent increase from 2013, with the annual cost of caring for a kid coming in anywhere from $12,800 to $14,970.
Housing accounts for the biggest chunk of the bill, at 30 per cent, with childcare and education, food, and transport costing 18 per cent, 16 per cent, and 14 per cent respectively.
Parents in the States are spending more on childcare and education than the '60s.
With the most insane taxation rates of (probably) any Western country, I expect much the same here in Canada.
We all love our kids and they are worth every penny, dime, and nickel, but let's pause for a second, shall we, and ponder that $250K?
Feel free to muse below about what you'd do with a quarter of a million dollars and no small hands dipping into your wallet.
Kids have come to expect it, yet this summer activity can break the bank.
About those ice bucket challenges . . .
Whether you love or loathe or are perfectly indifferent to them, celebrities have been dumping ice water over their heads left right and centre while raising precious pennies for ALS (Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis), more commonly known as Lou Gehrig's disease.
The way a famous person ice buckets reveals a lot about their character. Note: Bill Gates' pulley contraption and Lady Gaga's attempt to make dumping water over your head look artsy. Oh dear.
Note also how Justin Bieber, who did the challenge more than once, consciously drops his shorts an inch before proceeding—now that's one bucket I would love to have personally tipped.
My favourite IBC so far, courtesy of Huffington Post, goes to Batman, commonly known as family man, Ben Affleck, because of the nice little surprise at the end.
Remember the bad old days of slathering on baby oil in the hopes of getting an even tan? In China, women on beaches are going to incredible lengths to keep their skin protected against the sun, including donning a 'face-kini.'
According to an article in the BBC, beach-goers in their middle age are sporting caps with eyes cut out, like an homage to Spiderman or his burglarizing, balaclava-wearing cousin.
And if you're thinking that face-kinis are vaguely freakish, you're mistaken. Quite the opposite—they are styling, if the CR Fashion Book is anything to go by. The New York-style magazine published a photo shoot of women in face-kinis, complete with "chic swimsuits and fancy jewellery."
And in China, women are talking about face-kinis all over social media networks. Part of the cultural appeal, of course, comes from the coveted bone-white skin, which has long been synonymous with prosperity.
"Since ancient times, a classic beauty in the eyes of the Chinese has white skin," said one Weibo user. "Girls raised in wealthy families could afford to stay indoors and away from hard labour, and their rosy white skin was a sign of their good fortune."
In attempt to keep the effects of the sun at bay, the Chinese have a range of products available, from whitening creams, to specialized UV-blocking umbrellas, sleeves, and capes.
But the Western influence is never far. Tanning salons are apparently making their way to the metropolises...